This page is about an item.
Items can be bought from various vendors throughout Dong Dank



Swammies are a roleplaying tool first introduced on the Lords of Minecraft server.

Having been one of the very first items in the game to have special properties attached to it when the server started in July[1]; Swammies were originally intended to grant its bearer a massive bonus to Night Vision, Speed, and Nausea, alongside playing an accompanying soundtrack. However, many changes have long since been made over the course of time changing the inherent nature of the item. Swammies are and still will continue to be a cultural token of the server, server events and server gameplay aspects.

An example of the Swammie BGM.

Lore Information

A special type of algae called Tenocylidank (TCD), grew to be abundant in the waters of Dong Dank; which when a certain strand of fish consumed these algae, produced Swammies in the water. While Swammies are now obtainable by peasants through fishing and accessing the Swam Merchants in the Black Market, Swammies were once sold by the vendor NPC Shady McSwams in the Vineyard by accessing a special plot. However, a Lord conducted investigation showed that the shady dealer was murdered and for a short moment on the server there was no way to re-obtain the sweet, sweet dank.

Despite it's effects and nature, a swammie is not a drug, but actually a food, as a fish cannot be a drug[2].

Ever since then, Swammies have often been seen as "illegal" according to the Lords, and they have been used as tools to perpetuate roleplay conflict. At one point, Night Pyro introduced new Swammies such as the Swammies 2.0, that would stir controversies between his new Rebel faction and the pre-existing Loyalist factions devoted to the Lords on the server. In addition, Swammies have been seen as tools of political power that police factions such as the LPD use to oppress the many, such as the poor from the Slums. Furthermore, new Paladin and Bandit factions have been slowly forming over time, and these Swammies will become more prevalent during the Paladin and Bandits update.

Current Swammie Etiquette

As the ingestion of Swammies is illegal, you are immediately flagged as a bandit when eating one, unbeknownst to everyone else. Unlike regular Bandits, your name will not be changed, but Paladins can arrest you as you have broken the law. Eating a Dankest Swampt will announce to the entire server globally that you are “The Most Wanted Bandit”. As Bandits eat Swammies on a regular basis, eating Swammies will no longer give a speed boost reflecting the smaller buzz and higher tolerance regular drug use gives in real life. An exception to this rule is the Dankest Swampt which will always give a speed boost.

The Dank Watch

At the Warp Pads, players can click the icon of a clock representing The Dank Watch in order to be teleported to the last location someone ate a Swammie. Ten seconds later, they will be teleported back to the Job Market regardless of the previous location. The Dank Watch provides utility in observing "The Most Wanted Bandit" as eating a Dankest Swampt will make it so the set location is updated multiple times. Bandits and Paladins cannot use the Dank Watch due to the fact that they're not able to teleport with anything other than the Shardstones and the Warp Pipes. This makes it so that courageous peasants have to report to their nearest Paladin on the location of Bandits!


Swammin' Rig - Fishing in the pool of water at the Swammin' Rig makes Swammies spawn. With the objective of killing them to use as Paladin armor polish, Paladins cannot arrest Bandits when the job is at critical levels. In addition to earning gold and consuming stamina, there is also a small chance for actual Swammie items to drop. At night, hoards of Swammies will spawn whenever you use the rod as opposed to during broad daylight. There is also a 1% chance for a big slime, named Grand Swam, to spawn when the City Ale is at green levels. It will be announced in chat that the Grand Swam has arisen and will also state who got the killing blow upon death; rewarding all peasants a large stamina potion.

Relevant Information

During the early formations of the server, a fishing job was implemented that could allow peasants to fish and sell their goods to the General Vendor at the Market. However, an additional change was implemented by Lord Willakers that made it so that only Swammies could be fished; with different varieties of Swammies measured by size. You can get Swammies by fishing in a body of water with a fishing rod that can be bought at the General Vendor for 50 coins.

Air Justins, a new brand line designed by Lord Justin, gives peasants the ability to leap by pressing and releasing their sneak key if they have consumed enough Swammies.

Types of Swammies

  • Swammie - The normal, original type of swammies found on the server; which when eaten, the normal soundtrack and effects occur. It also tells you: "You have smoked 0.5 pounds of Dank Swammie!" in the Minecraft chat window.
    • There are several variations of swammies. You might find different versions with different tooltips:
    • Swammie: A dank and very illegal fish.
    • Swammie: Whoa! Don't get caught holding this thing!
    • Swammie: A very dank and very illegal fish.
  • Tiny Swammie - When eaten, it has the normal effects but faster music with a higher tune, it also tells you, "You have smoked 0.3 pounds of Dank Swammie!" in the Minecraft chat window.
    • Tiny Swammie: Ooo! It's like a baby swammie!
  • Big Swam - When eaten it has the normal effects but faster music with a lower tune, it also tells you, "You have smoked 1.2 pounds of Dank Swammie!" in the Minecraft chat window.
    • Big Swam: A big piece of dank fish!
  • Bigger Swam - 'When eaten it has the normal effects but faster music with a lower tune, it also tells you, "You have smoked 1.8 pounds of Dank Swammie!" in the Minecraft chat window.
    • Bigger Swam: A much bigger piece of dank fish!
  • Huge Swammer - When eaten it it has the normal effects but has the same music as Lord Justin's Totally Not Swammie soup. It also tells you, "You have smokes 2.6 pounds of Dank Swammie!"  in the Minecraft chat window.
    • Huge Swammer: Whoa! The size of this one!
  • ​Biggest Swam - When eaten it has the normal effects but faster music with a lower tune than the Huge Swammer, it also tells you, "You have smoked 2.2 pounds of Dank Swammie!" in the Minecraft chat window.
    • Biggest Swam: Not really the biggest by the way!
  • Dankest Swampt - When eaten it has the normal swammie effects but slower music, it also tells you, "You have smoked 42.0 pounds of Dank Swammie!" in the Minecraft chat window.
    • Dankest Swampt: The legends are true... Such a rare and powerful swammie. None could ever match it's greatness.